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I think I have nightmares nightly because fear is your body's favorite wake-up mechanism. So the nightmares usually happen just before I wake up...
Some of them are hilarious. "Better wake up before your ex boyfriend gives you a hug! Ooga-booga booga!"
"No! I'll never let him touch me again! Not even for a hug!"
"Damn... That was terrifying."
#Author #Nightmares #Funny
I want to post more stories to the internet but I don't want people to be afraid of me... I use real life as inspiration. Sometimes people tell me a secret and I hide it in a fantasy book. That's part of why I wait a month or two before I even type something off of pen and paper, unto the computer.
#Secrets #Sharingwiththeworld #Author #YIKES
Every moment waiting for your favorite publisher to say something about your most recent submission is like being in love. But instead of him making you wait 5 minutes to text you back, ya'll are old fashioned and use snail mail (I've done it. Beautiful torture.) I'll get an email to soon and then I'll know if I'm the author of a children's book or just the writer of one.
Writer= Wrote the thing but it's in a neat stack locked in your basement.
Self righteous a**h*** who scold you for making a semi self promotional post in an author's group make me laugh. Yeah. Get out of my inbox. Beg the admin to make you a self righteous admin! Not just an a**h*** .
Guess what's part of being an author? SELLING THE DAMN PRODUCT!
#Author #Asshole #Metoo
"You're such a horrible person for not taking care of people! Don't scold your friend for not having a job! Give her some of your money! Don't tell off that old lady for coughing on your grandma! Take her to the doctor! And while you're at it, put someone through college why don't you?"
Eh, yeah. f*** off. I don't even have enough money to support myself. I've got my family and they finacially take care of themselves. I'm just a cheerleader and the guy who holds the other end... read more
Some people from my hometown are huge jerks and I want to unfriend them on facebook but then they'd see me in person and confront me. God forbid my balls drop when they ask "So why'd you unfriend me?"
"Because you never have anything nice to say."
#NutUpOrShutUp #SickOfGettingPickedOnByAdults #ICanBeABiggerBully #Author #DontTestMe #Facebook #a**h***
Keep your advice to yourself.
Got a letter from that jerky old lady. Started out "Sorry" but then I dunno. Had my mom read it, give me the highlights, then I skimmed it, found too many insults rooted in vaguely condescending explanation and tossed it into the trash.
"Let's move on and move forward." Yes. Let's. It's Wednesday. That happened Sunday. Leave me alone. Don't call me. Let's move on. Thanks.
Did I mention my tooth hurts?
#Sick #Toothache #Author #Oldlady