So... my whole world is in a little turmoil. It is not a bad kind of turmoil, just intense. less than 2 months until I move 4000 miles away from home, friends, family... for a long time. I am so excited for what the future holds, but I am also incredibly terrified. I feel like I am letting go of friendships that were hard to gain in the first place. I feel like I can't even trust my own emotions, because I have the unique perspective that the end of things can bring, and I don't know if that is a good lens to see through - or at least make decisions through. I have this friend, we've been friends for a long time, and we have flirted for just about the whole time we have known each other. I really like this person, but have never said anything. At this point I know it is not realistic to think that a relationship could happen from it, as I am about to leave, but I also have more courage to speak about these things because I know I am leaving. I will be back after a few years, but I don't expect anyone to put their life on hold for me. I am sad though at the anticipation that people will move on without me. Should I let this person know I like them? Just to put a smile on their face to know they are loved? Or should I trust that the friendship will last the time I am gone and not make things more complicated than they should be? Everything seems to be more complicated now. But I think that is just me. It is this in-between time that is the hardest for me. I am better at dealing when I am in one place or another, but this is transition. I am so ready for these 2 months to be over, but I am going to cry my eyes out on the plane for the people I am leaving behind, and the life that I am leaving behind, with whatever possibilities it might have had.
Any advice or encouragement... would be great