I don't love you. i try to, but i don't. I'm so sorry. every time i think i do, i know that its not real because its an on and off thing. i love the person that i made everyone, including him think that i absolutely despise. i learned to hate him almost as a self defense mechanism so i don't get hurt, but i come back every time. i never told anybody this. not until i get past this by keeping it in and think it through. I'm sorry.