This is a really weird thing to complain about. but people can't tell if i'm a dude or a chick (i'm a dude) and i don't know how to feel about it. i like how i look. i can say i'm pretty attractive. but... uh. it leads to a lot of awkward situations. like today. some guy came into work to fix some electric problem. and i was told to supervise him. guy is around my age. we talk and stuff. an hour later it's obvious he's trying to flirt with me. and i had to break it to him that i have dangly bits and he's made a terrible mistake. and he wasn't done his job so we had to sit there awkwardly as he finished it/had a gay crisis.
this kind of thing happens a LOT.
so yeah. i wish i looked/sounded a lot manlier and i've tried everything i can think of short of growing a beard because ha. guess what? i can't. shaving my head? nope, still get mistaken.
i USED to look like a guy up until i was 12. but then all my friends started getting taller, growing body hair, getting buff and looking older. and i just...haven't. i don't know what i'm doing wrong. seriously. why me? i'm a grown a** man and i look like a fairy that hasn't aged past 17.
also idk if I'M having a gay crisis now because this one guy at work keeps picking me up and touching me every chance he gets, and at first it was annoying but now i don't know it's kind of nice and he's attractive...but i'm pretty sure i like girls. but idk man he calls me 'your highness' and gives me this look and it's not so bad? ok f*** maybe i'm a little gay g**d*** it. i hate my life.
you know what this site has been helpful. ranting about this has made me realize what i should do with my life. i'm going to be a god damned forest hermit. screw this. i'm out. nope. f***ing done.

(but for real if anyone has any ideas to look manlier please let me know i'm dead on the inside i'm too ashamed to talk about this with a therapist. maybe i just don't age very fast? god i don't know)

#venting